I was up at 6:30 this morning to work and I’ve been quite emotional. I keep thinking that I won’t be around for my children as they grow into adults.

I know that death is inevitable and I planned for it the best way I know how, by buying and paying for life insurance to benefit my children when I am gone. However, because I’ve been healthy my whole life, I didn’t anticipate facing cancer and questioning my mortality before my kids were grown.

Oh, there’s always the possibility of getting shot to death by a mass killer while doing the most basic of life tasks, or many other possibilities, but I live such a boring life and I hardly go anywhere but the grocery store, I thought those chances were minute. Now, I just don’t know.

I’ve been reading a lot of breast cancer survival stories. It’s a war. And I am willing to fight it because of my kids, my mother, family and others who love me.

Being raised a Christian and maintaining my belief in God thus far, I have been in constant prayer, just asking God to have mercy on me and allow me to be around for my children.

I hope my day improves. I am working from home, so I don’t want my kids to see me like this when they wake up on this rainy Sunday.